The world made it complicated and assumed I had an ulterior motive, and it sucks, but I understand why.
There are self-hating black men who date white women for contrived and pathetic reasons and I hate them.
I can't say that my own mother has never asked, "When are you going to bring home a girl who looks like me?
" Running around with white girls comes across as a rejection of your blackness to the women in your family, even though that wasn't the case. The girls who showed me the most attention at school were white.
The story of Till's murder didn't scare me as much as it made me want to piss off racist fucks even more. I don't say that as some guilt-ridden rationalization for dating white women. Before I was even 10, I started having crushes on girls, trying to get my first kiss, and all of that. I thought this girl was hot because of her freckles and I thought that girl was hot because of her soft hair or whatever and I just wasn't in fifth grade thinking about the racial ramifications of features that I found attractive. I was consuming all of this media and I could just sense from the adults around me that, as a black person, when I was watching , it was expected that I be more attracted to the girls in Destiny's Child than Britney Spears.
Though those events are something of which I'm always cognizant, I didn't adhere to them as any sort of cautionary tale. The idea was always to live my life however I wanted to live it. But it does have an unforeseen effect on your outlook when you're one of the few black families in town.I went to a black high school and I wasn't on any of that thug shit and I'm not saying all black women want thugs, but at my high school, a lot of them did and they didn't really care about me. I wasn't like, "Oh my God, black women don't want me," because I'm not entitled to any woman.But there were white girls at school who were fucking with me and that's who I went with.But because I know I'm not one of those sellouts, I feel no guilt about dating white women. A lot of white women have been extremely accepting of and loving towards me my entire life and that's all there is to it.If anything, I just hate that there's such a vast misconception about my intentions from people who don't even know me. Though this very article was written in an attempt to bring context to these consistently misunderstood relationships, I don't have to explain who I date to anyone. I never really think about race while dating unless somebody else makes it an issue or I notice that the way a white woman I'm with looks at something is flawed because of her upbringing. I view it as an opportunity to educate and eradicate even a small amount of ignorance.
I was taught the story of Emmett Till by my mother at a young age.